janu-weary

my facebook status reads...

"if january is any indication as to how the rest of 2011 will go for us, heaven help me."

which would be the title of this post if it wasn't so long.

of course we've had our good moments this month, such as adele's blessing, emaline's potty training, ava's birthday, and the recent return of bryce's youngest brother from his two year mission in canada. remember?

but i could've done without adele's 3 day hospital stay at the beginning of the month. thankfully, it was nothing more than an ear infection. unfortunately, she had to endure multiple blood tests, a spinal tap, chest x-rays, and lots of poking and prodding to reach that final diagnosis.

and let's not even begin on the many hospital bills piled up on our counter not only from this, but even some still from her birth.

checking the mail just isn't fun these days.

neither is checking the bank account.

as if hospital bills weren't enough, we've encountered many other demanding expenses and what not this month that have turned our stress into worry and nights of lost sleep.

and then there was my cat who went missing. ironically, i hate cats. but not when i was 13, then i liked them... which is how old i was when i finally got the kitten that i'd always wanted. i had no idea that i was making such a life-long investment when i begged my parents for one. so what i should say is that i hated all cats, except for mine. i liked her. and after 17 years, i loved her. and the day i realized she went missing, i felt sick. sick knowing that i had no idea what happened to her or where she was and that i was partially to blame for shooing her out the front door and into the front yard where she rarely went. we went looking for her as a family, searching for two hours, but to no avail. and that's when it really hit me. i've been upset every night since she went missing, she was a part of our family for 8 years, and a part of mine for 17 years, of course i would miss her! we still look for her every day and hope that she'll just show up one day. yesterday, ava came home from preschool with a coloring she did of a cat... "i colored it brown, black and white, like ayesha."

i started crying.

in short, our january seems to have been filled with misfortune, mistakes, missed opportunities, mishaps, a missing cat and just plain miserable.

i'm praying that february will do us better.